The Law Of Christ

At Open Arms Community Church we’ve been doing a series called “Growing Closer To God” and this weekend we covered the topic of how community grows us closer to God.

In this discussion we crossed paths with a scripture that leapt out at me, Galatians 6:2 Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Interestingly, in the scripture the new testament, specifically the books of Romans and Galatians, address the fact that we are no longer under the law, that we are now free from having live up to a law we could never keep in full, and we are free from the consequence of breaking the law.

In all the discussion, Paul makes a statement in Romans 3 that even though we are free from the law, we do not nullify the law. Rather we uphold it. Is this a contradiction? Not at all! Paul is referring to something deeper, something more profound.

Jesus said the greatest commandment is to " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. '38This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. ' 40All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22) Jesus simplified all the commands of the old covenant into two simple commands, which he later simplified into one command, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.” (John 15). He also stated to “Remain in my love” and in another place “This is my command: love each other.” (John 15)

I realize that many people out there are trying to find deeper revelation and understanding about God, his will for their life, and secrets to the abundant life Jesus promised, but God spoke through Paul in 1Corinthians 13, “1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

God tells us that what really matters is one simple word, LOVE! This is the “law of Christ” that Paul was writing about in Galatians 6:2. James refers to this as the “royal law” (James 2).

What does this look like?

First we know that we operate under grace, not law. So, skip the idea that it’s a list of do’s and don’ts. It’s not a list of rules written on paper. It’s something written on your heart (Hebrews 8:10). It’s not something that is followed out of religious duty.

By Jesus’ statement that the greatest command is to “love” God and other people we understand several things.

1) Everything we do for God and others is motivated by Love, not religious duty/law.
2) Everything we’re involved in with God and others is to be done out of the context of relationship, not religious duty/law.
3) Everything we do for God and others is because we want to, not have to.
4) Living a life of love is the fulfillment of all God wants and desires for us and the entire universe.

The law of Christ is Love!

How important is it? Well, Paul made it clear in 1Corinthians 13 that without love everything else is in vain! The Holy Spirit spoke through John, “This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother.” And again, “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death.” (1John 3)

So, we can see that this “law of Christ” is of huge importance to our eternity. Our living a life of love is proof of our new birth in Christ, proof that we are really God’s Child. Our living a life of love is proof that we’ve passed from death to life! This makes love huge!

So, back to the question… What does it look like. The simple answer is look at the example of Jesus. That’s what love looks like. It’s not always convenient, comfortable, painless, and happy. True love costs and is inconvenient and is even painful at times.

For those that like lists or descriptives to help them better understand what this love is that we’re called to live out, here you go… (1Corinthians 13:4-8 Amplified) 4Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.
5It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
6It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.
7Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].
8Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end].

Every time I read this list it challenges me. Every time I read this list I feel like getting militant and making it my code. In part that’s okay, taking it seriously, but love is something that comes from the heart, not a list.

Some people seem to think this love is simply saying, “I love you”, but Jesus teaches us different.

We are meant to live out of our heart/spirit. The fruit of the spirit is love, etc.

This list gives us an understanding of the person and character of love (Jesus), but is exemplified by the very life lived and laid down by love in the flesh (Jesus).

We are meant to follow this example, walk in the way of love, live a life of love, and let love be our guide.

It’s one simple question… Is my motivation, my attitude, my thoughts, or what I’m about to say or do, love?

Anything less is not Christian.

Sacred Vs Secular

Among churched folk (and those who were once unchurched, but have spent enough time around churched folk) there is a tendency to separate the sacred (with/for God) from the secular (without/against God). In other words to look at a thing, experience, activity, or whatever and judge it (right or wrong, for better or for worse) by some inward standard of whether it is holy or evil, right or wrong, good or bad, God or the devil.

The problem, and thus the error, we often fall into is our standards are flawed by three major blinders 1) Our prejudices (perhaps born of fear), 2) Our preferences, and 3) Our limitedness (fallibility and ignorance). There is a fourth, our Pride, but that is a whole other subject of which all 3 of these falls into.

I do not separate parts of our Christian life as sacred (with/for God) and parts of it as secular (without/against God). I fully admit that in the world there are things sacred and things secular, but as a Christian all of our life is sacred and every thing we do is meant to honor God and please Him.

So, let me make three statements and then give some real life examples.

1. God made everything! The days, nights, stars, animals, people, and every detail of these things. Though these and many other things of God's creation are abused by misuse, idolatry, perversion, and so on does not negate the good, necessity, and God-ordained purpose & practice of these things.

2. God also came in the flesh on a mission to redeem this misused, abused, and perverted creation (all of it) and called all of His followers to engage in the same mission. We’re called to redeem and reclaim that which has been stolen and destroyed, and take it back for God’s glory and kingdom. As God engages the world to take that which is meant for evil and use it for good, so should we.

3. God did also declare a standard of right and wrong, of how these creations were meant to operate, function, and be used, and he declares in the book of Isaiah, "Woe to the ones who call right wrong and wrong right!" (Don’t be too quick to yell “Amen” just yet!)

Example: Sex! Does God declare a standard of what is right or wrong concerning the function/experience of sex? Yes! Is there misuse, abuse, and perversion of this God designed function/experience? Yes! Does the misuse, abuse, and perversion negate, invalidate, or make sex wrong or evil? No!

You see, the misuse, abuse, and perversion is wrong, and perhaps you could say evil, but the proper use/application of this God created function/experience is not only good or great, it's beautiful, right, holy, and of God (a blessing from him and is blessed by him).

Here is the problem. We tend to focus in on surface issues and judge the whole. We declare the whole apple tree bad because of a couple bad apples. We'll focus in on a specific abuse of sexuality say, homosexuality, or child molestation, or premarital sex, or adultery and turn around and have a negative view/attitude toward all of sex. We act as though sex was created by the devil. We act as though sex is wrong and have a huge distaste for the subject. In some areas we even question how a person could be a Christian and practice such foul behavior.

You can apply this to so many broad subjects such as Alcohol, Sex, Entertainment, Holidays, Music, Technology, and so on.

But here is where I want to see transformation.

Instead of looking at the negative and finding the worst in something, instead of giving the devil and sin glory by preaching how bad something is or how disgusting and wrong something is, let's focus on the God side.

For example: Halloween. Here is a holiday that has been perverted by many people throughout the years, yet it started out as a "Christian Religion" holiday and has more roots in Christianity than the Christmas and Easter holidays.

Many Christians view Halloween as the "Devils day" and as a bad thing. It certainly can be argued that it has been perverted and come to that, but in all truth, whose day is it really? Who made October 31? God did! Do you think he made it for the devils glory? Do you think we as Christians should declare that day as the "devils day" or declare it as "God's Day"?

Sacred or Secular... as a Christian is there supposed to be a difference in our life? Is there supposed to be certain things in our life that are sacred (Godly, holy, right, and good, with/for God) and other things in our life that are secular (ungodly, impure, wrong, and bad/evil, without/against God)? The answer is simple. No!

See, sacred is who you are not what you do. And because it's WHO you are it changes WHAT you do into being sacred. As a Christ follower you want to do everything in word and deed for the Glory of Jesus (Colossians 3:17) . In other words, live a sacred lifestyle so that everything you do is sacred (pleasing to/for the Lord).

Sex now becomes a sacred experience because you're approaching it from God's perspective and according to God's Standard. The same is true for eating, speaking, music, food, holidays… you name it.

Am I saying that you're turning evil things into good or calling good evil? Like saying that something God calls wrong (gluttony) is now right and okay? Not at all! What I'm saying is that we are now going to approach and handle that area of our life according to God's Standard and enjoy the sacred side of food & eating without the abuse, misuse, and perversion (which is what gluttony is).

You can't take something that is blatantly wrong by Gods standard and call it right (such as premarital sex), but you can stop and look at the original God intended purpose and function of that thing (sex within marriage between a man and a woman) and rejoice in and practice it properly. In doing this you are not only communicating the gospel, but you are demonstrating the life God want us to experience, and you are reclaiming/redeeming what rightfully belongs to God and his kingdom, but was stolen by the devil. Sex, music, food, drink, language, technology, holidays, you name it… none of it belongs to the devil! It all belongs to God and should be used and experienced to his Glory and Pleasure. This is called “life to the full” or the “abundant life” that Jesus talked about in John 10:10.

Most of our "Sacred Vs. Secular" arguments are shallow and based on prejudices, preferences, and ignorance (limited understanding on the matter). Like Rock Music Vs. Classical style. We argue one style is sacred and the other secular (one holy/with/for God and the other unholy/without/against God), but God created music, period! All music belongs to him. Yes, there is abuse, misuse, and perversion of music out there, in all styles, but it doesn't mean we just condemn all music made in that style, and we certainly should not condemn it just because it's not a style to our liking. Do you condemn tomatoes and all who eat them as of the devil because you don’t like them?

God made everything and the things that God inspired man to "create" were moments that man was imitating our Heavenly Father, but when we took God's creation or the God-inspired creations of man and perverted, abused, and misused them, that is what made them secular, before that they were all sacred.

See, the same light bulb used in the church building, the same electrical outlet in the church building or your house, the same toilet paper in the church building or your house, they are all the same ones used in the strip club. Is the church or your house using secular light bulbs, electrical outlets, and toilet paper? Or do they order special holy & blessed bulbs, outlets, and toilet paper? Or is the strip club using sacred bulbs, outlets, and toilet paper? No! The sacred or secular is all in the proper or improper application; it’s all a heart issue.

My grandma used to say two sayings, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water." and "Don't throw out the whole bushel, just because of a few bad apples."

How long will we quickly judge and condemn a God-created activity/experience, labeling it secular, and loose out on the sacred robbing ourselves of the life God intended us to experience?

How many ways, in how many areas, have we cut ourselves short by a false religious standard created out of a mans ignorance, prejudice, fear, or preference instead of Gods Word?

When will we say, "enough is enough, I'm not going to allow the devil to steal from me all God created and has for me!"? Whether he steals it through literal perversion, misuse, or abuse, or whether he steals by way of a distorted false religious standard based out of mans ignorance, prejudice, and preference.

Is your life sacred or secular? Is it full of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control? Is it in line with the truth of Gods Word? Are you approaching life narrow-mindedly with religious (but unbiblical) standards and perspectives of holiness, righteousness, and spirituality?

Jesus said, I came to give you life and life to the full!(John 10) It is written that all things have been made pure through the blood of Jesus (Acts 10) and that we are to do everything to the glory of God! (Col 3)

I think many of us will be surprised to find out that God doesn't carry our perspective, preference, or prejudice toward a good many things in our world. To bad because the first thing I’d do is get rid of country music. Ha! ☺

Let's get back to His Word and do things his way!

Good Soldiers

2Timothy 2:3-4 3Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. 4No one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian affairs—he wants to please his commanding officer.

What is a “good” soldier?

It’s one who understands and lives out his responsibility as a protector and defender of both his fellow soldiers and the citizens he represents.

It is one who takes his role and responsibility seriously, seriously enough to interrupt and inconvenience his civilian lifestyle, seriously enough to abstain from those things that would limit his ability to perform his duties to the best of his ability, seriously enough to motivate him to prepare diligently sharpening his skills well before any need arose.

It is one who takes seriously the preparation, training, necessary to be victorious in the battles he will face.

It is one who takes his enemy seriously and doesn’t let his guard down.

It is one who understands the transcendent cause to which he has committed and is so compelled by that cause and commitment to both live and die for it.

It is one who understands the nature of the war he is engaged in, understands his enemy, and strategizes seriously for victory.

It is one who, no matter the odds or how hard things get, will never ever quit.

It is one who considers the cost and lays aside self-interest (selfish living) to serve THE King and fellow countrymen and those in need.

It is one who keeps his eye on the cause and the prize and doesn’t loose sight of either no matter what the situation.

It is the label each Christian is to live up to, not for just anyone, but for THE King of all kings and THE cause of all causes.

The Difference

I was having a conversation with a friend that led into the fact that the average stay of a youth pastor in a church is under 2 years and the average stay of most pastors is somewhere between 3 and 5 years, but the other reality is that the longer a minister stays at a ministry the more effective they and the ministry become.

So, we have an obvious problem, but interestingly it’s not a problem isolated to ministers and ministries. It’s a problem across the board of life.

The key issue is commitment/perseverance.

In America we are used to immediate gratification, instantaneous results, fast food, fast cars, fast relationships, fast money, microwaves, instant potatoes, you name it, and we face the same problem… less than great/best results.

Very few have learned what many of our grandparents knew to be true… persevering hard work pays off. They knew nothing is easy, nothing is perfect, and so you have to commit, work hard, endure the bad and enjoy the good, but above all… persevere.

In the lives of many people, if the relationship gets too boring or tough and requires work and sacrifice and discomfort, then we just get rid of it, and we apply this same principle to our work, church, and our relationships with God, family and friends.

Not only has our “microwave mentality” affected our commitment to long-term results, but so has another aspect of our society, namely the “disposable mentality”.

Very few things are built to last. It used to be if a TV, computer, or VCR broke, you would pay to have it repaired, but not any more. Now days, you just trash it and go buy a new one. Why? Because we all know that today’s products are not built to last, they don’t have the same quality as the products of our grandparents. Therefore, it’s cheaper and wiser to just buy a new product than pay the money to have the cheapo outdated product repaired.

This “disposable mentality” has also crept into other areas of life. If a job or relationship doesn’t seem to work right, doesn’t run smoothly, or down right gets broke, we just throw it away.

The effect of these two mentalities is tragic and catastrophic in our nation and around the world in industrialized nations.

First, we are a selfish people committed only to our personal happiness, comfort, pleasure, and so on. No one and no thing is more important than me and thus we live in a world where everyone is consumed with looking out for number one only.

No rule, relationship, or anything else is more important than trying to fulfill me and therefore, nothing is sacred, nothing has my devotion/commitment, anything can be broken.

If I’m not the center of the attention, if this thing doesn’t revolve around me, then it’s not real, has no value, and doesn’t have my persevering commitment.

Second, we are people who are shallow and have no depth/fulfillment in life. Because we break things off every time they don’t center on us, gratify us, or work out smoothly we have nothing in life to anchor us to reality or life in general. We are a people with no roots… no roots in our job, our relationships, our faith.

Thirdly, we are broken people. With so many people being the “discarded” in life, the one’s not worth the time and energy, we have a lot of wounded, broken, and empty people. Not only that, but by our brokenness we are a dysfunctional people who don’t know how to have fulfilling relationships, jobs, and faith. We don’t know how to stick with it, how to question and communicate without feeling that “fight or flight” mentality kick in, and how to accept that no matter how strong the relationship with another person their world does not revolve around just you, it’s not all about you. They have other people in their life that they love and care about too, and this reality doesn’t mean they love less, or are less committed, or that the relationship isn’t real and should just be trashed.

This brokenness not only effects our commitment in relationships, it effects our commitment to work, our commitment to personal health, our commitment to good stewardship of all God’s blessed us with.

So, the key… Choice!

Choice of what? Choose to commit unwaveringly to the things God has called you to; your relationship with him and those around you, your stewardship of your person and your material wealth, your work, you name it.

Have a persevering attitude. Not a quitter attitude. Don’t embrace the “Immediate Gratification Mentality” or the “Disposable Mentality” when it comes to the important areas of your life. Understand that a good experience and quality living in the area of relationships, wealth, health, and faith come through time, hard work, and weathering the storms and not giving up; in a nutshell the difference is… perseverance/commitment.

Good News

It’s interesting that Jesus used the term “gospel AKA: good news” to classify His message to the world. Yet, if we are honest, most of the world gets a different message from Christians.

It would seem that many churches and church people are communicating through attitude, word, and deed that God hates the world, is angry with everyone, and is against them, but the Bible teaches something different.

According to Jesus, “God so LOVED THE WORLD that he gave his one and only Son.” (John 3:16) In this most familiar verse of scripture in the whole world Jesus communicates God’s attitude toward the world. He loves us, all of us, with a love that initiated a pursuit and redemption of every human being.

Jesus took it a step further. Not only did he teach that God loved the world and was at work for their eternal good through Jesus Christ for the life to come, but is at work in our everyday life for the good of every person, not just the saint, but the sinner too! Jesus said it this way, “He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” (Matthew 5:45)

God is at work in our world for good… for the good of every person. He’s at work in the life of each person for good; to draw them to himself and to help them experience life to the full being all God created them to be.

Most of us are blind to the works of God in our life. Most go unnoticed and the few we stop and recognize we quickly pass off as being the product of something else. We need to learn to see the unseen! Develop those spiritual eyes.

How will we experience this “goodness of God”? Two ways, 1) through the direct operations of God himself (God does things in our life that go unseen. Like stalling us in a traffic light to miss an accident, working healing in our body beyond what a doctor can do, and causing certain factors to line up that are favorable, to name a few) and 2) Through the avenue of Nature: This happens in two ways…A) God has established order in the world to our benefit and B) He works in the hearts of people to bless us at various times in various ways.

While we have little to no control over nature we do have control over ourselves. So, the question is… Am I open to being used by God to demonstrate His goodness to others?

What message, as a Christian, am I communicating? By attitudes, words, and deeds do people experience the good news/gospel or bad news?

LEFTOVERS

I don’t know about you, but if I walked into a restaurant and ordered a meal and it came out cold and soggy I’d be a bit miffed. Let me add, I’d feel a little weird if someone invited me over to his or her house for dinner, without forewarning, and it was cold soggy leftovers. I may or may not have passed.

Does this turn your stomach? Let me give another picture…

Imagine a pro athlete on Game Day going out to the beach, swimming, maybe going to a mall shopping, going out to dinner, and heck, let’s mow the lawn too, then he goes into the arena, suits up, and runs onto the field to play the game.

How good of a game do you think he’ll have? What benefit will he be to the team? What is he really offering to his boss and teammates? (The answer is leftovers or not much of anything)

We do this often with God… but he deserves our best. Our best time, best talents, best energy, best character, best thought, best you name it.

So often we claim Jesus is number one in our life, but in all honesty we are hypocrites.

A hypocrite is literally a person who wears a mask, a person who pretends or acts, a fake, someone whose claims and lifestyle do not match or line up.

While we claim Jesus is Lord (the master, boss, supreme authority) of our life we don’t live like it… we still run our life (acting and reacting) the way we want to or feel like in any given circumstance.

While we claim Jesus is number one (first place) in our life we don’t live like it… If we can’t fit Bible reading, prayer, church, serving in ministry, or just plain acting like a Christian by serving someone in need into our busy schedule then we just cut one or all of these things out because we can’t cut out those extra hours of work, or hobbies, or movies, or TV, or household chores, and so on.

In a very real way, when it comes to our lives, for most of us God is just getting our leftovers, the cold soggy parts of our lives; Certainly a lot less than our best.

I challenge you to examine whether God’s getting your best or your leftovers. Ask the tough question: Am I a hypocrite? And then respond accordingly.

We don’t ask these questions just to gain information. The point of learning is always transformation through application. In other words, if we’re not acting like a Jesus is really number one in our life, then let’s admit it, and change! Start living with Him as number one, doing things his way getting His results!

The fairness of the gospel

As I’ve spent much time witnessing to non-Christians I’m constantly questioned on the fairness of God in requiring people to go through Jesus alone to be saved instead of alternate means. Why not just being a good person will get you into heaven? Why not just any religion will do?

If you entertain these questions seriously other questions must inevitably be asked. Like: How good is good enough? Where would you draw the line?

It wouldn’t be fair for God as the creator of all mankind to have made some able and good enough to do it on their own while others fail (some in little ways and some in major ways).

And, in regard to various religions: How do we deal with the exclusiveness of some of the religions? In other words, All religions claim to be right, but many of the religions claim to be true and the ONLY way.

For example: Islam claims to be the only way. Christianity claims to be the only way. Hinduism claims that all ways are right. Buddhism believes the state of perfection is ultimately the state of nothingness and in the big picture there is no right or wrong, no God or man, it’s all one, it’s all nothing, but something (this particular religion is a contradiction in itself). It is clear that while all these religions claim to be right and true, they cannot all be right and true. Whether it is due to exclusive language claiming to be the only way, or whether it’s beliefs that contradict other religions and spiritual reason, the bottom line is THEY CANNOT ALL BE RIGHT.

We all have different personalities and abilities. We all have different desires and dreams. While to one being rich is a sign of being blessed, to another it is a sign of selfishness and sin. So, we can clearly see that man is not the one who should be in the position of defining the standards of right and wrong or deciding for themselves or others what’s the best way to heaven.

So, back to the question… HOW CAN GOD BE FAIR IN REQUIRING THE ONLY WAY TO HEAVEN TO BE THROUGH JESUS CHRIST?

The fairness is this:
Rather than basing a mans eternity on his own standard or the standard of others God established the standard, so it would be fair to all and show with absolute clarity and accuracy the standard of right and wrong.

This Perfect Standard is found in the Old Testament and is known as The Law.

God showed the world what is good and evil, right and wrong, according to HIS standard, which by the way is the standard of heaven. Therefore, in fairness God established the code and, in fairness, no one measured up. No one could make it to God on his or her own merit. No one is perfect or good enough by God’s standard.

Thus God implemented a second phase of his plan for imperfect people to access a perfect world/existence; by the perfect man and sacrifice, Jesus Christ.

It’s perfectly fair for God to say, no one measures up and therefore all need a savior.

It’s perfectly fair to put all of humanity in the same boat of imperfection and need. And, it’s perfectly fair to make the issue of right standing with God an issue of faith in the work of God in the flesh (Jesus Christ) as opposed to one mans moral goodness over another.

Faith is something we can all do, being good enough (if it were possible) would only be for a select few who were educated and influenced to make sound moral judgment over personal wants and desires.

The fairness of God is that he equally loves and values every person and has made the way to heaven equally easy by simply choosing to put our faith/trust in the work He (God) did on our behalf through Jesus Christ. By simply choosing to make Jesus the ruler of our life and do our best to follow his way from this day forward, which, by the way, Jesus summed up the spirit of the law (not the letter) by defining it as simply loving God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and loving your neighbor as yourself.

So, as Jesus becomes the ruler of our life and we start to follow the Jesus way of life it is simply a life lived in love toward God and people.

How much fairer could it be? Trust God instead of earning it and from that point on do things his way (loving God and loving people) as best you can, always striving to get better. It just doesn’t get any easier or better or fairer than this!

The fog of Self-absorption

Self-absorption. It is when a person is so focused on themselves they loose sight of reality. Their focus is on what I WANT, what I FEEL, what I NEED ( this particular one is more an issue of perception that actual need. Need being by definition, something that is a necessity in sustaining life. In other words, you can’t live without it. An example of a real NEED would be air, water, etc.). They become consumed with this focus to the point that it’s really an obsession and they loose sight of reality. They live according to a false perception of life. The result is they make decisions that are not according to truth/wisdom. Many times these decisions are unlike them and contradict common sense. Almost always these decisions are destructive in one way or another and of coarse there is the negative impact on our experience with God. We enter this fog and loose our joy of the Lord, we loose a thankful and praising attitude, and we usually drop off in our prayer and Bible reading, only to take up a negative, pessimistic, victimized, depressed, gloomy attitude, becoming more prayerless, faithless, and viewing life less and less according to the reality of the truth of God. In this fog of self-absorption we loose sight of the truth/reality of circumstances and people, including ourselves. We begin to enter into this deception/delusion and perceive everyone and everything else as the reason for our unhappiness and dissatisfaction. With the fog of self-absorption we pass the responsibility and blame on other people and circumstances rather than recognizing the reality of the situation and our part in it.

This description sounds extreme and we may to quickly write ourselves off this list, but my experience is that all to many of us are SELF-ABSORBED / SELF-OBSESSED. Whether the obsession/focus is proactive (pleasing self, focusing on what I want) or reactive (pleasing self by justifying and victimizing self, focusing on what people or circumstances have done to me), either way you are still focused on self.

My finding is that very few people, even professed Christians/Jesus Followers, are absorbed or obsessed with pleasing Jesus and being more like him. I’m finding that many, maybe even most, are absorbed/obsessed/consumed with pleasing themselves and being Christ-follower/pleaser in name, but in lifestyle they are a self-follower/pleaser.

My finding is that it is our obsession with self that is the root of the majority of our problems and unhappiness in life. Our focus on self brings us the very results in life that cause us to be dissatisfied and unhappy, but we can’t see this because of the fog that self-absorption brings. We’re blinded by this desire to please self and so we can’t see that our very motivation to please self is what leaves us displeased. Our focus of making self happy is why we’re unhappy. As it is written in Galatians 6:7-8 DO NOT BE DECEIVED: GOD CANNOT BE MOCKED. A MAN REAPS WHAT HE SOWS. THE ONE WHO SOWS TO PLEASE HIS SINFUL NATURE, FROM THAT NATURE WILL REAP DESTRUCTION;

We are consumed with pleasing our Ego (being stressed about peoples opinion of us), pleasing our fleshly desires consuming whatever it wants (in whatever form that comes in from food, drink, drug, sex, to excessive sleep, excessive entertainment, and so on), and pleasing the desires of our eyes (we’re never happy/content with what we have. We always want more. The newest thing, The latest special edition, the faster version, the sparkle and the glitter, it’s a sale so I saved money!). The problem is none of this truly satisfies, fulfills, and brings meaning to life. It won’t make you truly happy.

We fail to recognize that this self-obsession of pleasing our Ego FOR OUR LIFE TO COUNT AND HAVE MEANING is what keeps it from counting and having real meaning, because it’s still ALL ABOUT ME and my exaltation/satisfaction/happiness. Our life will never count and never have real meaning until it is lived the Jesus way; FOR JESUS! For Jesus’ pleasure, glory, and satisfaction.

It’s funny, but many Christians are approaching live (especially life as a Christian) with the exact opposite mindset of what is written in Matthew 10, where Jesus says, ANYONE SEEKS TO FIND HIS LIFE WILL LOOSE IT, BUT ANYONE WHO LOOSES HIS LIFE FOR ME WILL FIND IT.

Why do I constantly hear so many Christians saying, I’M JUST NOT HAPPY, or I FEEL UNLOVED, or I WANT THEM TO ACT THIS WAY OR DO THIS, or I FEEL DISCONNECTED, or I NEED YOU TO DO THIS OR SAY THIS, or IF THEY DON’T ACT THIS WAY THEN I’M JUST GOING TO LEAVE?

What is all that talk? That’s not the Jesus way. That’s the way of the selfish world.

Why can’t I see the extremeness of my self-absorption? Because, I grow up this way! I’m used to living by what I feel. I’m used to thinking about what will please my flesh or ego. I’m used to seeing and wanting. In this lies the FOG of self-absorption.

I’m so focused on what makes me happy, how this person hurt me, how I want this but can’t get it, how unhappy I am, how nominal my life is, how these people don’t include me, how nothing is done my way, how this will make me feel good. In it all I loose sight of Jesus. I loose sight of reality, truth, life, and the way. Then people wonder why they feel so lost, so distant and disconnected.

The problem is that most are so blinded by the fog of self-absorption that they can’t see the truth and reality of their situation. They can’t see that much of their problem is excessive focus on themselves and that much of their perceived unmet needs are really just exaggerated concerning their priority/necessity and are the result of not doing things the Jesus way.

Only the Jesus way sets me free; truly free. Only the Jesus way brings me true happiness, true satisfaction, true meaning, and even glory.

Jesus never said to focus on self. He said to DENY YOURSELF DAILY. Jesus never said to fix your eyes on self. He said to FIX YOUR EYES ON JESUS. Jesus never said to focus on pleasing yourself. He said to THEREFORE, I URGE YOU, BROTHERS, IN VIEW OF GOD'S MERCY, TO OFFER YOUR BODIES AS LIVING SACRIFICES, HOLY AND PLEASING TO GOD—THIS IS YOUR SPIRITUAL ACT OF WORSHIP (We're to please God).


So many of us say, I BELIEVE IN JESUS, or I FOLLOW JESUS, or I BELIEVE WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS, but we don’t live this way. We don’t live according to our values. We live according to our feelings/desires, and most of those feelings/desires are focused on what self feels/wants, not what Jesus feels/wants.

You see, if I feel unloved. My natural selfish response would be to withhold love, but Jesus teaches to love even those who hate us and are our enemy. I admit this is not easy, but the reason it’s hard isn’t an issue of the labor of application, but instead is an issue of breaking out of the old self-pleasing way of doing things. The old way that always puts self first… what will make me happy, feel good, feel vindicated, feel pleasured, feel satisfied, feel free, you name the label.

When we act selfishly it goes against the nature of God. To put it in musical terms, to act selfishly is to play a note that is not in harmony with the chord/song that God is playing. It’s an off sound that doesn’t go with the music.

Not only does our selfish/self-absorbed living offend God, but it’s out of harmony with the God life, therefore we don’t experience what God wants for us and instead experience far less. Then most of us want to blame God. How silly.

Not only does our selfish/self-absorbed living offend God, but it offends others. Society/Civilization only works when people live selflessly, keeping God first and caring about others. The more self-absorbed/selfish a society gets the more offended the people are and the more disharmony you’ll experience in both severity and quantity. Whether we’re talking about a home or a nation or a world, this truth prevails. Selfishness destroys.

So many people are hurting, but they don’t see that whether that hurt is legitimate or just a perceived hurt (due to an unmet expectation) they are continuing the hurting. By focusing in on self they are staying hurt, magnifying it, even increasing it.

Many fail to see that by chasing after the fulfillment of their Ego Desire, Flesh Desire, or Eye Desire they will only increase the pain and hurt. By chasing after that possession they will only end up financially distressed, not to mention that possession will still leave them unfulfilled. By chasing after that other person, because they’re unhappy in their marriage, will only end up making their marriage worse, never better. By fearing rejection and never confronting a problem in a relationship we only end up enabling the problem to continue and it continues to hurt us. By being negative about things we end up reaping the seed we sow and our experience will be negative. On and on we fail to see the consequence or effect of our self-absorbed living.

Only when our focus gets off of self and on to Jesus (who is the way, truth and life) will we be able to see things as they truly are, experience life to the full, and know the way to this fulfilling life.

The path of true fulfillment, meaning, and happiness are not found on the wide road of selfishness, but instead on the narrow road of selflessness. Jesus told us few would find this road, because the bottom line is, while many say LORD, LORD, not all DO THE WILL OF THE FATHER (Matthew 7:21)

So, here are some practical steps to burn away the fog of self-absorbed living…

1. Pray and ask God to show you how you’ve been selfish lately and especially to show you in the times where your being selfish.

2. Read the scriptures faithfully, especially the New Testament.

3. Decide to not speak negatively, but instead develop the lifestyle of looking at the good and potential in things and people.

4. Start to praise and thank God for all you have, all his blessings, all the ways he’s worked in your life and the lives of those you know. So, praise God, not just for you, but for others as well. Develop the habit of praising and thanking God all day every day in all things.

5. Pray for God’s blessing upon those people or circumstances you struggle with.

6. Pray in all circumstances to see things as God sees them. (As you become more knowledgeable of the Bible, you’ll know some of these answers without asking.)

7. Always keep the question in your mind, even in front of your eyes if necessary, WHAT WOULD PLEASE JESUS IN THIS CIRCUMSTANCE or AM I PLEASING JESUS BY WHAT I’M THINKING, SAYING, AND DOING?

When we do these things, when we do things the Jesus way, we will get the results he promised… LIFE TO THE FULL, A YOKE THAT IS EASY AND BURDEN THAT IS LIGHT.

The yoke most of us are tied to is hard and the burden is more than heavy, it is unbearable. We feel depressed, exhausted, like we can’t go on, like it’s not worth living, like we want to escape, angry, let down, unloved, stressed, and so much more all because we’ve never taken the yoke of Jesus and carry his burden; we’re still holding on to our own burden. The thing is, we were supposed to give that to Jesus when we became a Christian. We were supposed to have surrendered and given Him our whole life. We were supposed to have LOST OURSELVES FOR HIM, giving up the old yoke of self-absorbed living and all that comes with it and taking on the new yoke of simply living to please Jesus alone, doing things his way, seeing things his way, feeling things his way, thinking things his way.

I could say so much more, but you get the point. I pray God will help us all to hear his voice calling us to… Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. (James 4:7-10)

I do want to make one thing clear: The selfless life is not carrying the burdens of other people (living to make them happy, living to please them, living to be the answer to whatever crisis or circumstance they find themselves in). No the selfless life (the opposite of self-absorbed living) is to carry the burden of one (living to make Jesus happy, pleasing Jesus, and being His answer to whatever particular situation he desires to use you in).

When we decide we will no longer live selfishly it doesn’t mean we take on this life and perspective that just works and stresses itself to death to please and care for other people and never caring for ourselves.

It all starts and ends with Jesus. When we decide to no longer be absorbed with self (in a positive view of self or negative view of self) we are simply putting Jesus first; his pleasure, his glory, and his burden.

The great thing about the Jesus way is that we recognize we’re not God and can’t do it all. Jesus isn’t asking us to do anything FOR him, he’s asking us to do things WITH him, and it makes all the difference in the world. Now I don’t carry the burden of the outcome. I don’t carry the burden of pleasing everyone, making sure they all make the right decisions, making sure they’re all happy and cared for. Now I’m free to love them all and prayerfully be lead by Jesus on what to get involved in, who to try to help and in what way.

We don’t stress about caring for and pleasing others or ourselves. We trust God to meet our every need (and some desires) and to use us as he sees fit to bless and help others grow in the Jesus way.

Optional Obedience

If God says to do something or NOT do something, do I have an excuse to disobey if other people disobey?

For example: If a fellow Christian doesn't treat me in a loving way is this an excuse to disobey Jesus' command to "love one another as I have loved you"?

If a spouse is unfaithful does this mean the victimized spouse is free to break their marital vows too, engaging in romantic or sexual relations outside of their marriage covenant, ignoring Jesus' command "do not commit adultery"?

If a co-worker acts arrogantly and self-serving does this give the Christian license to disobey the command to "clothe yourselves with humility, serving one another out of love"?

I think we as Christ-followers have been approaching our obedience to God from a very worldly/non-christian perspective. The reason why is obvious... doing it the way God says to is not always easy, comfortable, pleasant, or pleasurable. In fact, sometimes it's just plain hard and uncomfortable, but something to remember is this: Our comfort zone is usually within the parameters of what we (man) can do, so we'll experience ordinary, natural, man-sized lives/works/experiences. On the other hand when we step outside the comfort zone, outside the parameters of what we (man) can do for ourselves, but instead step out into the unknown, the place beyond us and our abilities it is there that we experience the extra-ordinary, the super-natural, God-sized lives/experiences/works.

Have we lost sight of the fact that only God can change people and if we're really going to see people changed then we've got to release God into the situation. This is done by praying and obeying. It's done when we handle the situation and behave in the way that Jesus says to. Our disobedience simply closes the door to us being used by God and everyone involved experiencing what God wants in that situation.

Only through our obedience, especially in the hard situations, will we be used by God, see God do amazing things, and experience Gods blessing in our lives.